Friday, March 30, 2012

Fun Factoid Friday

It is time, yet again, for another stroll through the seemingly useless, yet fascinating facts of life...

1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning

Umm..hmm..yeah, I ain't buyin. I think that's a nefarious plot by the fruit industry to make me cut back on the java. Don't think so! Good try though evil apple growers of America!

2. A quarter has 119 grooves around the edge.

Okay, so I've always been one of those people who hear these things and take them as a challenge to find out the 'truth'. I think in this case, I'll just trust it's so. Who wants to count a quarters ridges? I certainly don't.
3. The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.
Yeah, I know..I'm so mean. :p
Have a great weekend!

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

A peek inside my mind...

So sometimes you hear writers talk about this crazy thing called a muse...we almost always refer to him/her/it as a real being with real thoughts who's only goal in life is to mess with us and give us entirely too many plot bunnies to deal with, to the point that even penned and coraled they still figure out some way to get out, bump fuzzies and create a firestorm of TOO MUCH.

Obviously the muse is our metaphorical way of describing our thought process, how we get our ideas, which ideas slide right to the top of the pack and maybe make their way to a novel (if they promise to be good and shut up so we can think!) or sometimes they're like that guy in your home room class who's so freakin' hot and you're totally crushing on him until he opens his mouth and starts talking about farts and how many girls he's laid and 'hey babes, you wanna be number 10'...ewww gross. Okay, so those we trash. But what gives us the ideas..

Well, I can't speak for all writers but I can speak for myself. In my R(eal) L(ife) I'm a very quiet, studious person. I look at the world around me. I don't just go for a walk and plug my headphones in and forget there's a million other people, other things going on around me. I guess in some ways I tend to look at the world like a great big novel and my plot is just one of many that creates that story. I'll see someone run past me and I'll wonder why're they're running. Too lose weight? Because they're angry? Because they're happy?

Sometimes I'll read a story about a man marrying his car, nah..I couldnt' even come up with a storyline on that one. Too weird even for

What I find myself most inspired by is nature. I'm very blessed to live in one of the most beautiful places in the world. For instance I go walking every day on this trail behind my house. The trail is framed by trees on either side. But these aren't the normal trees you see on the mainlaind, these are twisting, knotted things that seem to reach out from the ground like a great big hand and with green fingers shotting towards the heavens in a large sprawling blanket of leaves. There's also another tree that has this great big mound around the base with the most amazing spread of wild flowers growing in thick bunches around it. The petals are the most amazing shades of pink and purple, sprinkled with white throughout and I always think if fairies existed, they'd totally live there. Then I start thinking well if they lived there what would they be doing?

And boom, plot bunny. Which is good and bad. You never want the well to run dry because then that means you won't be able to write anymore, but sometimes (like now) you've got a series you're trying desperately to finish and you just can't entertain thoughts of fairies flitting from stem to stem at night, glowing like willow o wisp's gathering dew. Although....*tucking that thought away for another day* ;)

And just because I'm in a sharing mood I'll share with you the picture of one of my favorite trees. I call it:

                                                         RAINBOW IN PARADISE

No, it's not is exactly as it's called a Rainbow Eucalyptus Tree. Now tell me that wouldn't inspire you!



Monday, March 26, 2012

Do what?!

Okay, so every once in a while I'll come across something that's so weird I just have to post about it. This is bound to make men ridiculously  happy. Not sure I buy it, but stranger things have happened. Apparentely:

A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

Now I haven't done any digging, but I bet if I search, this article was written by a man. Just sayin...wouldn't put it past them.

Also read Hunger Games is killing it in the box office, apparently they made more money in opening week than all three Twilight movies did. I don't think combined, but..whateves...

On that note, I gotta ask...I've read part of the book, while well written, what in the world is the appeal? It's a bunch of kids killing each other and the world watches on in glee. It disturbed me, I won't deny that I'm not curious about the film..but anytime you throw kids killing kids, or kids getting killed into the equation and you get so graphic with it, bugs me. Clearly I'm in the minority though, the books and movie are making money like gangbusters. I dunno, maybe I've finally become my mother..

The other day a teenager was driving down my road with her windows down and rap blaring so loud I felt the beat through my bones and thought "ugh, too loud." Only to then gasp when it dawned on me, I'm one of those old people I used to make fun of in high school. OMGosh...*snort* And here I am trying to write YA.

And if you've just figured out this was the blog about nothing, then kuddos to you.... :-D

I'd be shocked if anyone's reading this thing

Friday, March 23, 2012

Fun Factoid Friday!

Okay, so since I never post on the weekends, I think I'll start a fun little segment called Fun Factoid Fridays. It's a bunch of random, useless, but true facts. If anyone knows more, feel free to share!

Did you know:

1. All blue eyed people have a single common ancestor?

2. Green eyes are the result of a genetic mutation?
(That means the X-men really do exist!)

And finally...

3. The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by Egyptians in 2000 B.C.

(Mmhhmm...chew on that one for a while. ;)

Happy Friday!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Truth? Or fiction?

An old man gets a knock on his door late one night. It's a caller petitioning his services. He's got a sick cow. The only cow the poor family can afford to keep. No one knows what's wrong with him, but he won't eat, he's stopped producing milk, and now the farmer thinks he may have no choice but to shoot him.

The old man sees the worry scrawled on the farmer's face, the tight lines around his eyes and mouth. Without the cow, they are destitute. The family most move. The wife, more than likely, will leave the farmer who's made her life so miserable since moving away from the city.

The old man, fingers bent from arthritis and years of plowing away at a cold hard ground, reluctantlly grabs his floppy leather hat, pushes it down on his head and asks the farmer to follow him to the barn.

But there's a secret neither man knows a thing about. A beautiful child, with sloping brown eyes, had decided earlier in the day to hide and play with her pet mouse in the sweet smelling hay on the open air loft. She rolls over when she hears the doors open and gazes in silence, but with her heart in her throat, when she watches the men enter with a cow in tow.

The old man, her father, grabs his brown satchel from the peg on the wall. She bites her lips. She's not supposed to see this. Her father always warned her to stay away, to  never ever look when he did his work. But if she stops them, if she reveals herself, she'll be whipped for hiding in the barn. So she bites her tongue and what she sees will haunt her for the rest of her life.

Her father opens the bag and pulls out a plant and a tiny glass vial. He sets them aside, rolls up the sleeves of his dirt encrusted shirt and starts a fire in the center of the dirt floor. The flames build slow at first, growing and growing, until they resembled an inferno pitch in the eyes of the five year old. Her father picks up the plant and lights it on fire, but instead of it burning, it smokes. Dark and black, fills the space up with the rich musk. Her heart beats faster and faster. The wind rips through the barn, shaking the walls, lifting up pieces of hay. They dance around her head like tiny yellow fingers. Tears squeeze from the corners of her eyes.

The cow moves, starts to buck and grunt. Her father shouts at the farmer. "Keep him calm! Don't let him move."

Then it's all quiet. Still. So very, very still. The mouse she'd been holding wiggles from between her fingers and runs away, a shrieking squeak following in its wake. Her father glances up. She hides herself deeper in the hay, in the shadow. He narrows his eyes.

"What do you want, Arquimedes?" A disembodied voice echoes everywhere and nowhere. In her head, in the room, it travels through her blood and makes her choke on a scream.

Her father turns and gazes into the fire. He opens the glass vial and sprinkles the dust within onto the flames. The flames snap with threads of silver and blue. "The cow is sick."

The demonic voice does not answer again, but her father nods. "Yes, I will pay the price."

Her lip quivers. What price? What is her father saying? Her nails claw at the wood she's laying on, she feels the splinters slip under her nail beds, but she doesn't care. She knows, in her soul she knows, the price is too steep.

Do not make the deal, Papa!  But the words never leave her head, she's too scared to talk. To do more than tremble and pray. Pray that God will hear her. Save her from the darkness slithering like a snake in the barn below.

Then the fire is wrapping around the cow. It's screaming. The whites of its eyes overtaking the black and the farmer is screaming, "Is she okay? Is she okay, Arquimedes?"

Her father holds out his hand, as it to say: wait a moment more.

The child can do nothing. She's frozen in her terror.

Fire dies. The wind is calm. The air is still and then she sees what's made the cow so sick. It's body is covered in worms. It's crawling out it's skin, from it's nose, slinking out it's eyes. It goes on and on for ten minutes, until finally the last worm drops to the ground.

Her father takes a torch and lights the worms on fire. They pop and hiss, and after a few moments all the remains is fine layer of black ash.

The farmer pays the old man and walks out of their lives forever. The cow is never seen again...

So...fact or fiction? Bet you wanna say fiction huh? Seems to incredible to be believed, right?

Well, it's true. My mother was hiding in her father's loft one night in Panama. He was the town witch doctor. The village was too poor to take sick animals to vets, in fact..a vet was a luxury few in the country of Panama could afford in that day.

My mother told me that story when I turned eight. So if you've ever wondered why I write paranormals, it definitely stems from stories like this one.

And on that note...


Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Back to our regularly scheduled program...

Stupid trolls! *mutter mutter grumble grumble* Thanks for the peroxide, Viv, totally got it out. I kinda smell like a hospital room now, but least people aren't crying  and turning green when I walk into a room anymore. *wink*

So...boring ol' me has come here to blog and enlighten your world. *snort* You'll find my blogs generally tend to be silly, kooky, and mostly uninformative. That said, I love writing blogs. I love being silly and hopefully entertaining you for a few minutes out of your day.

A little about me first. I write Urban Fantasy and here lately have even ventured into the scary, sometimes gag inducing world of first crushes, homework assignments that leave you sick to your stomach because you have absolutely no idea how to make a winning science project, that cute boy that totally doesn't see you today, but you keep praying and hoping that tomorrow will be the day  he opens his eyes and says, "Hi, how you doin?"

I'm talking about the always perversely fascinating world of YA. A.K.A. Young Adult. I've written 1 book out of a projected 4 or 5 series called: Chaos Time. I'm currently trying to convince NY that I'm pretty freaking awesome and sell my book for oodles and oodles of money. I'm thinking Stephanie Meyer success would be quite nice, thank you very much! *g*

Until that day comes..., I'll toil away and live in a world where I'm the ruler of the universe and all must bow down and worship at my throne of wicked cool!

But I'm cranky.

Why you may ask, because I'm worried. And when I worry, I get cranky. What could I possibly have to worry about..well the fact that I always seem to miss the party.

Apparently there's a buzzword among the industry getting agents and editors all hot and bothered.

Geek! Yeah, you know the nerdy guy with the pocket protector and tape wrapped around his B.C. glasses.


Thanks a lot Diary of a Wimpy Kid!

For years the queen bee of books were:

Urban Fantasy/Paranormal.

Now I'm looking at both pictures and I gotta tell you, I'm way drawn to UF. The imagery is gorgeous. And there's just a plethora of ways to interpret a picture like this. Is she angry? Sad? Do mechanics really work on your cars looking that hot? *snort* Okay, so they might stretch the bounds of believability, but the thing is if I have 10 bucks and a choice between a nerd and a shape shifting mechanic that fights crime on the side, no question...crime fighting mechanic everytime.

Surely I'm not the only one who feels that way. And judging off the article I read, I'm definitely not in the minority. See I didn't tell you the whole story.

It was one article mind you, highlighting a minor demographic (if you consider European agents/editors a small minorty *snort*) that they are beyond sick of peddling paranormal. In fact, they're so sick of it that they're refusing to even sign new authors who write in those genres. Regardless (and here's the kicker) that the genre is still selling like gangbusters.




That sounds counterproductive to the bottom line, making money. Which is what I thought the business was all about. Catering to the needs of the readers. If the readers still want UF's who are we to say, "No, you're wrong. That's not what you want at all. Trust me, it's all about the geeks."

Which leads me to another thought...have you ever heard a song on the radio and thought, "Gosh, what a stupid song. I'll never like that one." But after three months of walking into stores and hearing that song on constant rotation, walking down a sidewalk and hearing little girls humming along to it, you start catching yourself singing it while cleaning and slowly what sounded so stupid (Justin Beiber) you're suddenly wondering, "why did I hate that so much before? It's not all that bad."

If agent/editors force us to read nothing but geeks will it eventually turn into..."UF what? Para who?"

And maybe it's just a case of sour grapes on my part because I love UF/Para I cannot imagine writing a book without it. Could I incorporate a geek into the story line? Sure? And I have, especially in my YA's, but I don't want to make them the main protaginist's,'s my world, my rules, my way. That's why. I want to write how I want to write, but will that come back to bite me in the butt?

Thankfully American agents/editors don't seem to be taking such an extreme stance on that and hopefully they never will, but it definitely got me thinking and wondering if I've wasted my oppurtunity to enter the market in the genre I love.

Then again, self publishing is definitely a viable option. Of course, that's a topic for another day. ;)

On that note...


I'm singing...and this is the best song in the woooorlld!

If you're looking for [Marie] you've come to the wrong place. My name's Sneed, Mortimor Sneed and I've got her. She's chained in my dungeon. Why? Because I felt like it. She's ugly and she stinks. That's a troll's idea of perfect (by the by).

She's currently working on her next craptastic novel..something to do with flying birds and death rays from some dude's hand. Wow, how lame. She's so stupid. Trust me, if she wrote a blog post you'd be bored. Oh wait, I think I hear her calling...


"Sneed, the fumes are getting to me. What kind of ink did you give me?"

I laugh. "Skunk juice."

"Oh gosh, I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Dance monkey, dance!!"

Did you hear that? The dull thud of a head hitting the desk?  No. Hmm...maybe just me.

Yeah, she thinks I'm  hot.